The Unknown Is Scary – And the News Doesn’t Always Help

Let’s talk about the elephant in the room: the unknown.
That blank space where information should be.
That waiting-for-a-text void.
That endless scroll through headlines that somehow makes everything feel worse, not better.

When my husband first deployed – early on in our military life – I clung to the news like it was oxygen. If it was on the screen, I needed to see it. If something happened, I needed to know. I thought staying informed would keep me in control.

Spoiler: it didn’t.

I watched news anchors report things that didn’t quite line up.
I heard “sources say” and “developing story” more than I heard from my own spouse. And even when the story wasn’t about his unit, my brain filled in the gaps anyway. Panic doesn’t care about facts.

I thought I was preparing myself.
Instead, I was drowning in half-truths, speculation, and noise. I learned what “no news is good news” meant.

Was there still worry? Absolutely. Was is easier? Sometimes. Did it take time to learn how to not react to every piece of news? Yes!

Now at 14 years and 5 deployments later, it is still on my mind every time he goes away, but I remind myself that “no news is good news.”

Now, should we trust the news? That’s a question for another day… and probably another platform.
But here is what I will say:
Not everything needs to be believed just because it was broadcast or shared on social media.

The stress of uncertainty – the “what ifs,” the “what now,” the “why aren’t they answering” – can mess with your sleep, your mental health, your relationships, and your ability to function. You don’t even realize how deep it’s gotten until you find yourself crying in a grocery store parking lot over a text that simply says, “I’m okay.”

You’re not weak for feeling it.
You’re human.

Here’s your reminder:
It’s okay to unplug from the chaos.
It’s okay to not have all the answers.
It’s okay to need help navigating the emotional whiplash that comes with being left behind.

Talk to someone. Another spouse. A counselor. A friend.
Don’t carry it all alone just because you think you should.

And if you need professional mental health support, please reach out. There is no shame in asking for help.

Mental Health Resources:

• Military OneSource (24/7 confidential help)
  1-800-342-9647 | militaryonesource.mil
• Veterans Crisis Line (for veterans & their families)
  Dial 988, then press 1 | Text: 838255
• TRICARE Mental Health Services
  tricare.mil/MentalHealth
• Give an Hour (free mental health support for military)
  giveanhour.org

Because the truth is, when you’re standing in the middle of the unknown, the smallest thing can make the biggest difference.